Toys 'R' Us in South Africa

A trip to the Phinda Private Game Park in South Africa was one of the real treats on this trip. Melinda, Jenna, and I visited a park in Uganda three years ago, and I really wanted for Pamm and the Forresters to have that experience in Africa as well. Our schedule in Uganda did not permit it, but South Africa has some incredible parks as well. A friend of Gary’s named Jimmy has some good connections. He is the exercise physiologist for the Sharks, Durban’s professional rugby team. He was able to get us into Phinda (PIN-dah, with a kind of puff on the “p”) at roughly a 75% discount, which is good, because it normally costs about $500 per person per night and we could not have done that. Here’s what we got for our $100 each.

We arrived shortly after lunch was over, but they held the buffet for us. We had a light lunch under the shade of a thatched roof porch high on a hill, overlooking miles of bushland that looked like the Texas Hill Country. When lunch was over, we were summoned to afternoon tea, since we were so late having lunch. Over tea we met our two rangers, Mac and Darrell, and received our briefing: stay in the vehicle no matter what.

We left for our afternoon drive at about four thirty. Within a few minutes we came upon a mother cheetah and her cub that had killed a nyala lamb (sort of like an antelope) and were having their lunch. The animals have no fear of the vehicles, and completely ignore them. We saw impala, cape buffalo, wart hogs, and zebra that afternoon. Since we were in the dead of winter down there, it became dark around 5:45. And it felt exactly as if someone had turned on the A/C. The wind picked up and the temperature dropped. We kept driving.

Our guide had a spotter/tracker named Leonard who rode on a seat built on the front of the land rover. He had incredibly good eyes. After dark he carried a big spotlight and scanned the bush for animals. They make it a practice not to spotlight animals that are not nocturnal. For example, we saw a pair of black rhinos, but he would not leave the light on them. He was looking for some lions that others had seen in the area.

Eventually we came upon them. At first you could see only the female lying in the grass. Leonard used a red filter over his spotlight which allowed us to see her clearly, but did not blind or disturb her. She was making a low roaring sound that was powerful. They said she was calling to her cubs in the brush nearby. Then the male sat up. He had been lying in the grass beside her, but you could not see him. He also began to roar, not loud, but deep and powerful. You could feel it. We were only a few yards away from them.

When we’d had enough of that, we drove further. The night sky was perfectly clear. The Milky Way was a thick cloud of stars over our heads. You could see the Southern Cross, a constellation that we do not get to view from our part of the world. When we had driven a bit, we stopped. It was time to eat again. The guides took out a table, spread a cloth, opened a box and set up for tea. We had steaming hot coffee, some stuff that is like jerky, and trail mix. Some had hot chocolate or tea. We stood around in the African bush having a snack in the pitch black dark, looking at the night sky. The Brits may not be much on coffee shops down here, but they are classy.

Eventually we packed up and hit the road again. Our driver said he smelled smoke. All of us did. He said it was likely poachers camped nearby and the turned the truck. Soon we saw fires burning. He was headed right for them. We thought we were going to confront poachers in the night.

When he stopped the vehicle we began the most surrealistic experience I’ve had since I sat in the home of a Moslem woman in Mbarara, listening to Christmas carols being played in Runyankore while CNN was on the tv. When we stopped we saw a path marked by torches and we were told it was dinner time (our fourth time to eat since we’d arrived six hours earlier). The torches marked a path into the trees. It looked like we were on Survivor and were headed for Tribal Council. We followed the flaming path into the woods.

We came to an opening in which there was a bonfire built and eight or ten long tables set up, covered with linen tablecloths, set with china and silver, lit with lanterns. Another line of tables held the buffet, and African chefs with tall white hats stood behind it. Yet another line held the bar. We were offered some prawn grilled on a stick for a “starter” (appetizer). Soon we were summoned to our tables.

The buffet consisted of a choice of meats (filet or duck l’orange), mashed potatoes, salad, carrots with honey and chili sauce, grilled zucchini, and bread. Dessert was a chocolate pancake (crepe) folded around a chocolate stuffing, and covered with a coffee sauce. I’m telling you, these people are classy. All this took place in the middle of the South African bush.

After a couple of hours of stuffing ourselves and laughing hard (the UBC table was the noisiest one and we were the only ones not drinking), we loaded up and headed back to the lodge. Melinda rode in the spotter’s seat and operated the light. She actually put the light on a pair of jackals.

The mountain lodge was as elegant as the rest of the experience. We each stayed in our own bungalow – large bedroom, sitting area, back porch, and large bath. We did not get to enjoy this much, because we got in late and left very early the next morning.

At 5:45 AM we got our wake-up call and went for our first breakfast – coffee, tea, bananas, biscuits (cookies). Then we drove into the bush again. We were looking for elephants and we found one not far from the lodge. A large male had come alone from the northern part of the park. When we found him he was dining on a tree. We drove within fifty yards of him and watched him as he worked hard to pull down a large tree. Amazing.

We then went looking for giraffe and found a small group of them with a herd of zebra mixed in as well. Two young giraffe were less than three weeks old. We watched them, or they watched us (giraffe seem to be very curious), until they tired of it and walked away. Then it was time for guess what? Tea. They set up the tables and served us again. Gary assured us they were not trying to impress us. Even if we’d not been there, they would have paused for mid-morning tea anyway. I think I understood where J.R.R. Tolkein got his meal schedule for Hobbits (first breakfast, second breakfast, elevensies, lunch, afternoon tea, dinner, etc.)

After hot chocolate and biscuits, we drove farther, finding white rhinos, wildebeests, cape buffalo, and seeing the cheetah pair again. Then we headed back to the lodge for our real breakfast at about eleven. This was a full meal. After eating we packed up, checked out, and made the three hour drive back to Durban, impressed with God’s incredible creativity and the South Africans' great hospitality.